Year Two...done and done, well, almost

The two weeks of my summer residency are over. I am in the shuttle on the way to the Minneapolis airport and listening to my cohort mates chatter behind me. We have sworn off any philanthrotalk for the moment, but we don't last long. We love what we do. Don't let any of them fool you, they love being a facilitator of philanthropy and they are so good at doing it! I am thankful to have them working to make this world better everyday.

Here are a few nuggets I picked up this year.

1) Boards: How many times have you established clear lines between management and governance with your board? We, as development professionals, become so aggravated when our boards begin to get involved in management issues and yet, instead of setting clear and understood expectations, we "go along with it." Why? Well, it may have something to do with the fact that the CEO reports to the board... ah yes, a delightful and perhaps necessary conflict of interest. The CEO has to report to someone, but how can we effectively guide and manage a body who has the ability to reward us or release us? Of course, personality conflicts shouldn't be the cause of a "thank and release," however, as we are humans... it happens. So imagine if you will setting up the guidelines from the beginning. What if you were to start off your first board retreat with this type of intro: "I need you to forget everything you have learned about being on a board. Throw away your assumptions and past models. We have transformational change to lead here and in order to do it we need to be transformational." And THEN you work to create an environment where EVERY board member has a voice, there is no forceful leader, there is collaboration, heated discussions and instead of report review, we ask meaningful, governing questions. What if.... why not?

2) Development Plans: These beasts are not for the faint of heart, but essential none the less. Basic? Perhaps, but we so often brush past the basic and run for the bottom line. How are you supposed to blow beyond the bottom line if you have no idea where you have been, where you want to go and how you are going to get there? My next question is, how can you get anywhere without buy in from your staff, CEO, board, community, donors, etc? You may be able to based on pure call volume and general people skills combined with passionate people, but one day, that isn't going to be enough. What then? Don't forget the plan people! Plans, while not perfect, help you move beyond the rut you will undoubtably encounter.

3) Cross-cultural Philanthropy: This one is simple: we are not all the same, we have different traditions, beliefs, cultures, etc. Understand the general and then get specific and individual. Regardless of culture, we are all individuals, however, we do have certain behaviors based on environment. Talk to people, understand them, know their story and then know if or how it matches up with yours.

4) Marketing: Know your audience. Common theme, eh? (that is for my Canadian friends). Know the tools; use the ones you can strategically. Test things to see if your message resonates and is clear. Don't talk to us all in the same way. This is the same thing you hear over and over and over again, and yet... we don't do it well enough. Let's all make the effort to understand it is about the cause, not the organization. It is about the needs of the community, not of you, me or Bobby Sue.

Thank you Cohort 19 for another amazing year. Next up, papers, online classes and then our Capstone. Oh for cute (said in a MN accent).

Trust, establishing it and destroying it

It is always amazing to me how long it takes to establish trust and how quickly we can destroy it. In our relationships, professional and personal, we work hard to establish trust, acceptance, communication and yet the first time we take it for granted, all of that work has the ability to fly right out of the window... sometimes never to return.

How can we have open conversation, be vulnerable, ask the cage rattling questions, push and pull, support and contradict if we don't have trust? We can't, not really. We can make believe that we are doing all of those things, but when push really comes to shove, we clam up and go with the flow rather than find our voice and lead the group, partnership, etc to a better place. This is horrific. It is sad. It is harmful.

Trust is the fundamental layer of all human and animal interaction. We, as humans, can be just as skittish as a wild animal that is in an unfamiliar or threatening situation. Yet once we build that trust after showing that we, you, all are safe, that vulnerability is welcome and appreciated, that no one person is the dictator, but all are partners, it is amazing what can and does happen.

The trust is established and you have a bad day, are tired, frustrated, whatever it may be and you "forget" to keep the trust flowing. You destroy the "safe" zone because you don't want, need, remember to foster the trust by open and accepting communication. You may not even realize it, because for you, it was just a bad day, but for the other(s) it was a horribly sad day that they can't let go and may never overcome.

So please, the next time you get frustrated that someone doesn't understand the question you are asking and requests clarification or tries to provide an answer that isn't acceptable to you or doesn't do something just as you would, don't snap, because that single moment can lead to the destruction of the very thing your relationship depends: trust.

Year Two... here we go!

My second year at St. Mary's for my M.A. in Philanthropy and Development begins today. I am sitting in a Starbucks in Rochester, MN awaiting the shuttle to take me to campus for two weeks of unadulterated philanthropology. Oh how the fire in my belly is starting to ignite just thinking about it. Around April of last year, I decided that if I didn't jump in full force and just go back to school, I wouldn't do it at all. I had to ship and ship fast. The following 2.5 months were a whirlwind to get ready for my first year. I was nervous, unsure, curious, excited, but most of all a sponge, ready to soak it all in. I decided that for the first time in a long time that I needed to be the student. I didn't have to be right, know everything, figure it all out. Ahhhh.... so nice! I loved the idea of leaving my consultant hat at the door and walking into the first class me, just me and nothing else. I wasn't here for my firm or for anyone but me, and it was the very best decision I could have made. What I learned from my cohort mates and instructors is indescribable. I was pushed to think far beyond where my mind usually takes me and was humbled by all that I didn't know. While I was aware that there was SO much to learn, I don't think I quite realized how narrowly focused I had been for so long... my doors were blown wide open!

And so here I sit, in anticipation of year two. I can't wait to see everyone, to push and be pushed, to explore and learn and teach and share all over again. There is no doubt the fire in my belly will be burning again after these two weeks, but I feel better prepared for it this go round. I am not as nervous, but nervous still. I am not overwhelmed, but more open to everything there is to learn and understand. Most of all, I am ready for the tremendous growth to which I will give myself over. It is amazing how much has changed over the past year, and at the same time, how much is exactly the same. Let the learning commence!

A little goes a long way...

Why do we resist?

I am in the process of trying to sum up all that my (almost) 40 year old brother has meant to me over the years. It is difficult to say the least to express that much love and admiration and appreciation into words. To me, it almost seems as if there really aren't words in the english language that can justify my thoughts and feelings, and so I resist. I resist writing them down because what if they can't or don't explain well enough. The words I know aren't perfect, so I resist writing them down, sending them, expressing them.

I see this practice of resistance everyday in my work. We resist taking risks, we resist writing thank you notes, we resist trying new things, we resist writing a Case that actually means something to someone, we resist - everything. We WANT to do it... we WANT to see the results, but we don't want to be responsible if the outcome is less than desirable.

Well guess what, if we don't do it, we will never know if it worked. If we don't send the letter, write the words, try something new, we will never know why something didn't work and how to do it better. If I don't write this letter, my brother will never know how I feel or what I think. So you have to weigh which would be more harmful... my words being somewhat inadequate or my brother thinking that I don't care as much as I do.

So the next time you are wondering if you should call your donor to say thank you, send a personal note, stop by to let them know what is going on... or simply show your appreciation, do not resist! A little goes a long way....

There's no U in Team

How many times have you heard this or something similar from your CEO/President? "We need X, so can you go and raise the money for that? Thanks." My guess is that if you have heard it a minimum of one time, it is too many.

I wish the "powers that be" would incorporate philanthropy and its impact into all educational programs. I'm not saying the curriculum should revolve AROUND philanthropy, but can you imagine if every hospital CEO actually understood and appreciated what philanthropy can do for their hospital, system, etc? What would it mean if philanthropy was no longer an after thought, but incorporated from the very beginning?

I have seen cultures change, CEO's grasp the concept, engage and voila... AMAZING success! It is exciting, it is empowering... it becomes transformational.

In a perfect world, the head of fund development has a seat at the leadership table, has an office near the CEO, is included in the strategic planning process, etc. What is interesting to me is how much better everyone feels when this happens and yet there is still such a strong resistance to change. I suppose that is human nature and our lizard brain getting in the way again.

I am so incredibly lucky. Right now I am working with two CEOs who are AMAZINGLY receptive! They WANT to succeed. They are DRIVING the process. Both of them always make the resources available needed to bring philanthropy to the most successful level possible. Yes, it is an investment up front. Yes, it calls for a change in internal culture. Yes, it calls for them to lead the effort, to speak out and in favor of these changes... no, it is not always easy, and yet, they always make it happen. Some days I hold my breath waiting for the shoe to drop. Waiting for them to say no - no more!

So what makes these two leaders so open to the process? So willing to engage? So appreciative of philanthropy? I don't really know for sure, but I plan on asking them on my next visit. I think perhaps it is that they are true leaders with nothing but vision...

What about you? What do you think drives this behavior? And better yet, how do we encourage more of it early and often?